My Laptop Is So Slow
A: My laptop is so slow.
B: Buy a new one.
A: I would if I had the money.
B: Why is it so slow?
A: That's a good question.
B: Did you take it to a computer shop?
A: I would if I had the money.
B: Well, I guess you have to live with it.
A: Sometimes I want to throw it out the window.
B: You don't want to do that.
A: Why not?
B: You might hit someone in the head.
Talking Animals
A: Do animals talk to each other?
B: Of course they talk to each other.
A: What do they talk about?
B: They talk about other animals.
A: What else do they talk about?
B: They talk about food and the weather.
A: Do they talk about us?
B: Of course they talk about us.
A: What do they say about us?
B: They say that we are funny-looking.
A: Ha! We're not funny-looking; animals are funny-looking.
B: We're funny-looking because we wear clothes.
A: Let’s go jogging.
B: That’s a good idea.
A: I bought a pair of new sneakers.
B: Are they comfortable?
A: They’re very comfortable.
B: How much were they?
A: They were on sale for $80.
B: Do they help you run faster?
A: No, but my feet don’t hurt anymore.
B: Then they’re worth every penny.
A: You might want to buy a pair.
B: I’ll wait until I wear this pair out.
Too Much Crime
A: Why is there so much crime?
B: Because parents don't teach their kids right from wrong.
A: Is that it?
B: Also, there aren't enough police.
A: But there are a lot of police.
B: There's only one police officer per 100 criminals.
A: Can't we hire more police?
B: No. It costs too much money.
A: Doesn't crime cost more than police?
B: Yes, it does.
A: So it would be cheaper to hire more police?
B: Yes, it would.
Cigarette smoke
A: Do you smell that?
B: Oh, yes. Boo!
A: I can't stand cigarette smoke.
B: It smells so bad.
A: One cigarette stinks up the whole sidewalk.
B: Smokers think they are so cool.
A: They are so weak.
B: A little cigarette controls them.
A: They look so stupid taking a puff. And their butts everywhere.
B: And then they blow smoke out of their mouth.
A: They think it's cool.
B: Cigarettes stink as hell.
A Good Salad
A: I love salads.
B: Me too.
A: I usually eat a simple salad.
B: What do you put in it?
A: Just lettuce, tomato, and celery.
B: That's it?
A: I add some pepper and salt.
B: I always put cheese in my salads.
A: Yes, cheese is nice.
B: What kind of dressing do you use?
A: I pour lots of French dressing on top.
B: Me too. French dressing is so delicious! Who cares about calories?
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